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Manny's Law: Seventh Topia


This is Seventh Topia, yep, that's the name of this week's column. I apologize for everyone down during the bye week, but if you watched TV 49 and saw my house tour, you definitely got your fill. I haven't seen it yet, but my family members and friends saw it and liked it. I can't do anything on the website without hearing from them these days.

For my bye weekend, Marcus Hudson, Vickiel Vaughn and I played a lot of bowling. First of all, they had to come get me out of bed and get me to go bowling because it was me and ice cream and my banana walnut muffins and my movies and that's all I was planning to do. It was just something to do. We are thinking about joining a bowling team. We are not really good. We just have a good time not being good. We use the balls they give us and for the most part we just have fun tossing it as fast as we can. We think you should get a score based on pins but also based on how fast the ball travels down the lane. If that were the case, I'd win every time. You can best believe I was getting my running slide on and doing my old man James Brown dance in those bowling shoes too. I had on my socks so I was still preserving the sexiness of my feet without being tainted by other people's feets (yes, I'm making up my own word again) and their fungi and odor.

Marcus and I also drove all around San Francisco. We went to see the Golden Gate, we drove past the Piers. We drove down the crooked street, Lombardi, twice. We definitely got to know San Francisco.

I watched zero football on Sunday. There were movies, and lots of movies, and more movies, and then video games. The best movie I watched was the Break Up. I thought it was hilarious. My favorite part was when Vince Vaughn got beat up by Jennifer Anniston's brother when he was singing with his group.

Let's talk about the weather. It's October and it felt like 90 degrees out there today. Something is wrong here. I'm not used to this. Tony Parrish was telling me this is what they call the Indian Summer. I was like, what? October is supposed to be cold where most normal people are from.

I'm not really complaining however because I'm really not a big fan of cold weather which is why I'll be packing long johns, hand warmers, feet warmers, individual toe warmers, a neck warmer, a back warmer and most important my ear warmers. I can't have cold ears. If I get too cold, I break out in hives and swell up. It happened to me one time, in 1989 when I was about five. One time back in North Carolina, it got really cold and my family thought it was just goose bumps until I started swelling up. You know how you blow into a nurse's glove to make a balloon? That's how bad I started to swell up. I got hives everywhere. I was put in bed rest with a toboggan, sweats, long johns, socks and some soup and a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and then I was fine. So I don't do cold weather.

They are going to see someone out there really dressed warm and that's going to be me.

We pretty much have all the motivation we need going into Chicago. They are an undefeated team and it is a chance for us to end that streak and their undefeatedness. Another new word for Manny's dictionary.

Rex Grossman, I don't know too much about but he seems to have a good head on his shoulders. He makes smart decisions and he's a guy we really have to get after. Their running backs are very talented, hard runners. I know Thomas Jones sees a hole, he's quick to take it so we really have to contain him and get him before he gets started. Benson did great things at Texas and he's a guy we've got to get to early before he can get momentum and disrupt our defense. They have receivers who really get after you and enjoy blocking and enjoy contact and won't hesitate to come and crack you. That's just somebody else I've got to worry about – namely Muhsin Muhammad.

Marcus Anderson is a friend of mine from Alabama. He played on my Senior Bowl team and he's leading them in sacks right now. Parys Haralson and I have to do something to catch him.

I've never been to Chicago and I'm actually really excited about this game. Since we didn't play last week, I think I miss that feeling of game time so now it's back. It felt something had been taken away from me to be honest, and so I'm real excited to get out there.

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