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Manny's Law: Fifthio

Linebacker Manny Lawson gets deep about sleep, talks more about feet, and elects to skim over the Kansas City beating in his latest Manny's Law column.

The fifth column shall be named fifthio.

Let's talk about sleep and how wonderful sleep really can be. Every time it gets close to my bedtime, I get so excited. I'm like a little kid when it's Christmas. My sheets of course have to be cool, my pillow has to be cool and fluffy, and then I get in bed and feel the coolness and I start kicking my legs because I'm so excited. That's the greatest.


Then, when you are sleep deprived, that's the worst. I can still function but I think about sleep and my bedtime so much and my bedtime never comes around fast enough. The worst thing to happen to you while you are sleeping is the annoying sound of that beeping alarm clock. It gives me chills. I wake up before my alarm clock goes off, just so I don't have to hear it. You might ask why even have a clock, but it's that mental assurance that you have IF you don't wake up before the alarm goes off, you've got an insurance policy.

I try to make sure I'm in bed before 11, but the real question should be how many times do I actually make it? Not too often, because film study takes a long time.

My sleep is sometimes interrupted because I'm a fat kid and I wake up in the middle of the night and I'm starving. I go eat a sandwich in the middle of the night. I have peanut butter and jelly usually, and a glass of milk.

My favorite dream is when I dream that I would be Hansel in the case of Hansel and Gretel and I walk up the gingerbread house and there's all kinds of sweets, muffins, candies and I'm just going to work on that yummy stuff. I just get the luxury of eating until I'm full and don't have to go through all of that stuff locked in a cage and getting poked by the witch stuff.

I also have nightmares. My worse nightmare is when I'm walking towards any type of food and it's almost right there within my grasp but I can never get it. I just can't reach it. I reach for it, and it'll keep moving away. It's horrible.

I finally figured out where Tony Parrish lives. I saw him walking his dog this morning and that dog still looked too big so I was a little nervous. I ended up getting the right angle up near my house and said what's up real quick and then ran into the house. I saw him pull his car out of the garage. I had a hunch about where he lived and I was finally able to confirm that my hunch was right.

My dad read the column and laughed at me over the toe food nightmare. My family reads all the stories online. My sister said I deserved the toe food.

She said that my distaste for feet should save me a lot of money because I obviously won't be going for pedicures at least. I did get a pedicure one time and it was pretty uncomfortable. The soak pan, my feet barely fit. It was tight. Then when she asked me to rest my foot up for her to work on, it cramped my legs so she had to back way up and all the women were looking at me in there. Then I tried to not squirm as she got the dead skin off my feet. I'm not ticklish but it was just uncomfortable. The massage though, I was in heaven. I got so relaxed I really started talking and relating to the women about hair products, fashion, and everything. I was trying to act tough but they got me. Despite the fact that I don't like feet, I'd rank it as an 8.

I refuse to talk about the Chiefs. That was another one of my nightmares. I haven't been able to eat too much lately. All I've been able to cook is Hamburger Helper this week. Otherwise I've stayed out of the kitchen. Last week stressed me out. I was embarrassed over that game. I lost weight and I've been so stressed.

The only thing I will say about the game is that every Saturday when we fly out the rookies are assigned to go to Popeye's and get the rest of the LBs food. My plan was to make Parys do this, but we didn't have enough time to get over there after our meetings, and so they took that into consideration and decided to go elsewhere which was a place known as Baja Fresh. It just so happened to be over by where I stay. So, because it was closer to where I stay and not Parys' place, I took it upon myself to just go ahead and take that one for the team. Please believe me, he's got the next one.

Supposedly two of my friends who I went to high school are supposed to come see me and come to this game, but they haven't told me anything. SO I'm going to have to call them again today, after calling them yesterday and the day before and the day before that. One thing I do know, they will not be taking over my bed. I'll get them some air mattresses, some nightlights, some blankets, pillows and I'm putting them on the floor in the guest bedroom. They can have the couch too, but I can't be kicked out of my own room again like my sister did when she came.

I think it helps that we played the Raiders in preseason. We lost, but playing them then and having it not count and then making our corrections will allow us to not make those same mistakes, and also give us an idea of how their team plays and what they are about.

It's another week where we still have to stop some threats from the receivers to the running back. Everyone says they have a young QB but he wouldn't be in the NFL, let alone playing if he wasn't any good, so we've got to account for him and the guys who protect him.

So all in all, regardless of what their record is, we still have a tough game ahead of us, even more so because they are trying to get their first win against us. It's going to be a very physical game, a game that is going to check players' hearts and guts.

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